Reasons Why You Need to Go to Al-Anon

Reasons Why You Need to Go to Al-Anon

Alcoholics can shake loved ones to their core with all the things that they do during the tumultuous times that an addiction is sure to produce. You may think that only alcoholics have 12-Step programs to attend to resolve their issues, but family members, friends, or co-workers that are affected by addiction have a place to resort to as well. Al-Anon is way to teach people affected by a loved one’s addiction that there is a way out.

 

The program is designed to help you change your attitude and expectations of an addict’s behavior.

You should not let the effects of the addiction have a grip on your life anymore. Letting the addiction have all the power is unhealthy for you and for the addict.

 

 

The program can help you learn about addiction in its entirety.

Knowledge is power and knowing how an addict functions mentally and physically can give you some insight on how to successfully deal with them ongoing.

 

 

The program pushes you toward a solution instead of enabling the problem.

Struggling to stay positive can seem impossible at times, but Al-Anon can show you how to get into solution towards an addiction that you have no control over.

 

 

The program shows you that you are not alone.

Addiction can be a lonely place for the loved one of an addict since the last thing you probably want to do is to broadcast to the world the extent of what is going on. Al-Anon is a group of people that you can relate to in the way of addiction.

 

 

The program teaches you to stop keeping the addict from having to deal with their consequences.

Human compassion can keep you from letting someone you love fall when they are suffering. Keeping an addict from reaching their bottom can keep the addiction going on longer than it needs to.

 

 

The program leads you to build hope through support and encouragement.

You will meet other people that are possibly going through many similar circumstances and feeling the same emotions as you. The group creates a fellowship where everyone can share open and honestly what is going on to build a rapport to comfort one another.

 

 

The program resets your life to find the appropriate focus which should no longer be the addict.

You may be addicted to enabling the addict. With the help of Al-Anon you can put the attention back on yourself again.

 

You must take care of yourself first before you can be available to help someone dealing with an addiction. Learning that you can live out of the shadow of an addiction will hopefully help you to move on to a life that can be more pleasurable and fulfilling.

If you, or someone you know, has a problem with drugs and alcohol, call Serenity Oaks Wellness Center to get them the help they need. Our program focuses on the clinical and medical aspects of treatment. Our staff is awaiting your call to assist you in starting the life you were meant to live. Call us today: 855-652-2683

How do I Overcome Shame and Guilt at Family Gatherings?

How do I Overcome Shame and Guilt at Family Gatherings?

Addicts are notorious for doing anything in their power to get what they need to keep doing what they are doing. This will make them do certain things that they could not fathom doing while they were sober. When addicts need to relieve the obsession that develops in their brains from drugs and alcohol, it takes what it takes. They usually do not care who they hurt in the process. An addicted person will most likely choose their addiction over even their basic needs of food, water, and sleep. As a result of the addiction behaviors, shame and guilt will surface.

Guilt can be felt with a cue of knowing that you are about to do something that you should not. The part of your conscious that will warn you about right from wrong is guilt. You will feel like a terrible person when guilt manifests itself through shame. Shame will show up when you have followed through with an activity that you knew was a wrong choice.  

Your addiction can make you stay away from family gatherings because you may be embarrassed by your actions. Overcoming shame and guilt can serve as an important purpose that will help you feel like you belong there.

 

  • Identify what you have done.

 

When you can take the to time to admit the things that are causing you shame and guilt, you are really making a breakthrough with the things that are holding you back.

 

  • Make amends where you can.

 

Once you recognize the faults that cause shame and guilt, use this opportunity to right your wrongs. Take the initiative to make amends to those that you have hurt. This does not mean apologizing because you have probably apologized too many times already without changing what you are apologizing for. Making amends shows that you are willing to change the behavior that was hurtful.

 

  • Change your ways.

 

Learning from your mistakes by making reparations can put you on the path to adjusting your sails. If you do something different in your behavior, shame and guilt can eventually go away because you will no longer be the person that did the things in your past.

Once you take full responsibility and start switching to more favorable behaviors, family members can hopefully believe in the shift that you are making in your life. Taking on this challenge may seem daunting at first, but once you feel the renewal process working, you can enjoy your family gatherings without having to worry about the past.

Serenity Oaks Wellness Center is 5-week addiction treatment where our qualified staff is instrumental in helping a loved one who has become addicted to drugs and alcohol start their plan of recovery. Every plan is uniquely customized to help them accomplish their long-term sobriety. Call us today: 855-652-2683

How Can I Ward Off a Toxic Family Member?

How Can I Ward Off a Toxic Family Member?

Having people around that are toxic is not good for quality of life. Friends that push buttons and are calculating can be easier to let go off once they cross the line of being unsupportive because they are just friends. What happens when it is your family? Do you just let go of somebody that is related to you? This kind of situation is not easy to go through or figure out with what should be done. Your relationships with your immediate family, spouse, and in-laws are way more complex to just walk away from. There are ties with these relationships that are hard to severe.

Some members of your family can be overbearing and condescending to cause you to feel less than. You should be proactive in how you handle these relationships by taking care of how you move forward.

Set healthy boundaries.

Putting boundaries into place for your own sanity is crucial. Boundaries should be formable to continue connections with the people in your life. When those boundaries are broken, then it is okay to keep your distance from family members that break them.

Learn to be assertive.

You are allowed to stick up for yourself. If you can keep your vitality constructive to have your voice heard, you will have a better chance of getting your point across. If you are full of disdain and talking down to your family member, your assertiveness will be a moot point.

Protect yourself.

If you do not protect yourself, nobody else will. Make sure you are safeguarding yourself against any adverse situations. Take the safe road and get out of any situation that will compromise your vulnerability.  

Limit your time.

Being family does not mean that you are required to spend a prolonged amount of time with them, especially if the time you are spending is full of negativity. Figure out what you need to do and put limitations on your time. This will give you a strategy to get in and get out.

When someone you love is hurting you, it is important to distance yourself from them to gain back the serenity and integrity that may have been lost in the emotional balance of the relationship. Part of this process is to revamp your self-esteem to help you to be happier and healthier. Using these guidelines can motivate you to be the bigger person while be a good example for others.

Serenity Oaks Wellness Center is 5-week addiction treatment where our qualified staff is instrumental in helping a loved one who has become addicted to drugs and alcohol start their plan of recovery. Every plan is uniquely customized to help them accomplish their long-term sobriety. Call us today: 855-652-2683

How to Help a Loved One When They Return from Rehab

How to Help a Loved One When They Return from Rehab

When a loved one who has become addicted to drugs and/or alcohol gets sober and goes to rehab, it is an exciting, but also a trying time for everyone involved. On one hand, an addict’s loved ones are relieved that their loved one is accounted for and they no longer must second guess what is going on. On the other hand, everyone is trying to acclimate to the new changes that must take place when their now recovering loved one finishes their treatment and returns home.

Attending a rehabilitation facility means having a well-structured environment.  Outside of the walls of the rehab, your loved one is now responsible for making new decisions that can be difficult for them. Fear can surround your family because they may feel like they must walk around on eggshells to prevent unnecessary conflicts and to prevent the much-dreaded relapse.

Before your loved one leaves the treatment center, an aftercare plan will be established for when they feel vulnerable to the obsession of their addiction and help them to transition back into their real life easier. Loved ones also need some help transitioning into the new world of recovery to make sure that certain actions are more helpful rather than harmful.   

Putting demands on a newly recovering loved one may keep them from solidifying their recovery by doing too much too soon. The first 90 days of sobriety can be the most difficult due to all the changes that they are making. Try to be supportive and give them time to adapt to their new sober lifestyle.

Learning how to be happy for your recovering loved one can be a hard task to pull off especially when you might be under the impression that family no longer comes first. Being jealous of the time that they are spending with their recovery peeps, in meetings, and in therapy sessions takes away from seeing their real purpose of trying to live a healthier life. All the effort that your loved one is putting into the recovery is giving them a chance to acquire long-term sobriety.

Getting help to stop enabling addict-behaviors will benefit your recovering loved one as well as your loved one finding difficulty in supporting another’s recovery. Having tools to dictate how to navigate through an addict’s recovery can show a loved one how to keep from being judgmental, taking the blame, being in fear of saying the wrong thing, or putting expectations on a recovering loved one that they might not be able to live up to.

Addiction is a family disease that can also be a family recovery. Everyone must have their separate program to get better. Growing together in recovery, can help heal old wounds that can open the family to bloom.

Serenity Oaks Wellness Center can help an addict in need to help them thrive in recovery. Our staff of therapists, counselors, doctors, and nurses are here to help make your treatment as comfortable as possible. Call us today: 855-652-2683

What is a God Shot?

Is Depression Contagious?

When you hang around the meeting rooms of a 12-Step program, you may hear the term “God shot”. You might cringe because the use of God makes you uncomfortable. On the contrary, it could make you feel like you belong because you have an amazing relationship with your Higher Power which you choose to call, God. The overtone for the moniker of God shot is intended in a positive way.

A God shot refers to an unexpected favor or a sign. The phrase attributes to a profound happening that cannot be explained, but not quite as remarkable as a miracle. It is something that gives an addict a warm feeling inside that indicates to them another reason to why they should stay sober. An example would be a rainbow at a time of self-pity or a prayer request answered in a timely manner that is beneficial. A God shot can accredit something that is unique and special to a spiritual person.

While a God shot may offer itself to someone as a coincidence, spiritual people typically do not believe in coincidences when mentioning something having to do with a Higher Power. “It’s not odd, it’s God”, is how it may be best explained in spiritual terms. People with spirituality using do not believe in chance occurrences. They generally will believe that things are exactly the way things are supposed to be, and that a there is a substantial plan that is part of the indication of a God shot.

God shots are only visible to people who can see it when their eyes are open to believing in them and when their heart is wide open to feeling their spirituality. There may be a message behind the God shot or there could be just an opportunity to know that there is a spiritual connection that is indeed something bigger than themselves.

Some people like to say that these God shots are accidents and they may well be to some people. People that do not believe in God shots have the right to believe in what they want. Other people in the coffee world, specify a God shot as the most heavenly, perfect espresso shot that there is to drink. Whatever the meaning of a God shot differs to, the one thing that remains the same, is the correlation – it is something out of the ordinary.

Serenity Oaks Wellness Center is 5-week addiction treatment where our qualified staff is instrumental in helping an addict start their plan of recovery. Every plan is uniquely customized to help them accomplish their long-term sobriety. Call us today: 855-652-2683

Tips to Reconnect with Your Family Before the Holidays

Tips to Reconnect with Your Family Before the Holidays

Addiction is a family disease that affects everyone that it comes in contact with. Once an addict gets sober, it is not likely that life will become automatically better without some work on themselves and the relationships that are important to them. Addicts in recovery should learn to take responsibility for their actions. By doing so, they can show the most important people in their lives that they are willing to do whatever it takes to clean up the mess they made by making an effort to change their ways especially when reconnecting before the holidays.

 

Have realistic expectations

 

Expecting loved ones to let an addict back into their lives may be unrealistic. There may have been a lot of damage that was done during the addiction that just cannot be taken back. The best thing that an addict in recovery can do is take the essential actions that are needed to mend the destruction that was caused by them in the first place.

 

Give time to heal

 

Addicts are known to keep repeating themselves in behaviors that betray the people that they are around because their addiction is their primary concern. Until the addiction is under control, an addict will most likely continue to harm the ones that come into their path. Depending on the magnitude of the circumstances, the people that are closest to the addict will have their guard up and will need to heal from the past. Everyone’s timelines are different, so the addict should continue to work on their recovery and give the people they hurt some space to heal. By stepping back and waiting, the addict is showing that are more self-less than selfish.

 

Communication is everything

 

Healthy communication is a must to rebuilding relationships. If your communication was not working before, it will not magically work in recovery either. Learning how to effectively communicate with a loved one takes some work on the recovering addict’s part. Start being a good listener instead of a good point maker.

 

Boundaries are good

 

Just because you are blood-related does not necessarily mean that the relationship is conducive to what you are trying to achieve in sobriety – serenity. Some family members might rub you the wrong way on a continual basis. If that is the case, then they may jeopardize your serenity which can jeopardize your sobriety. Eliminate unhealthy relationships to keep your life as simple as possible. Setting boundaries is beneficial for your sobriety.

The holidays can already be a time for tension and stress. Reconnecting before you meet for the holidays can be better than fighting over eggnog and sugar cookies.

To give your loved one a chance in recovery, send them to Serenity Oaks Wellness Center. Our innovative therapeutic practices and holistic treatments, can be helpful in repairing broken relationships as well as give them the confidence to stay sober.

Call us today:855-652-2683

Best Tips to Being Present on Christmas Morning

How do I Overcome Shame and Guilt at Family Gatherings?

Christmas can be a time for addicts and alcoholics in recovery to keep their distance because they can feel like they are outcasts from the rest of the world. Early sobriety can leave addicts and alcoholics seemingly raw. The feeling of unworthiness can arise in lieu of celebrating something as meaningful as Christmas morning festivities. Taking time to experience the joy of the holidays can be achieved by doing a few simple things to be present on Christmas morning.

 

Stay in the moment.

 

If you are reliving the past or getting into the future, you can really limit your usefulness to be of maximum service to the people around you. Instead of holding grudges, harboring resentments, or putting unnecessary expectations onto the special people you surround yourself, stay in the moment and just enjoy your Christmas morning.

 

Appreciate the life you GET to live.

 

While you were living out your addiction, you probably had some really terrible things that transpired for you. Although you made the decision to get into recovery, you will still have a life that is full of ups and downs and that is sometimes difficult. You can walk through anything, including hanging with relatives that make you cringe, without doing something to numb yourself. Live your life to the fullest to appreciate the life of recovery that you get to live.

 

Keep your eye on the presents.

 

The gifts of sobriety are some of the best presents that you may ever receive. Reconciliation with friends and family, serenity, faith, and acceptance are just a few reasons to keep your eye on the prize that recovery has to offer you.

 

Bottom line – be grateful.

 

There are so many things to be grateful for during the holiday season, especially in sobriety. You could probably always find the things that irritate you or inconvenience you, but if you can find the things that you are truly grateful for in any situation, you can turn that frown upside down and preferably be full of gratitude.

Christmas morning can be daunting for some people that are less fortunate or newly sober. Even if you do not have a ton of presents, you can be present and present yourself as a sober person in recovery. That will be the best gift of all that you will be able to give on Christmas morning.

Serenity Oaks Wellness Center is an extensive 5-week program that is focused on helping to relieve the stress of starting the recovery process. Please call our team of specially trained admissions counselors to get you started today.

Call us: 855-652-2683

6 Tips to Helping a Loved One Through Depression

6 Tips to Helping a Loved One Through Depression

Depression is a serious disorder that can keep someone who is struggling with it from feeling like they have a way out. You can really help your loved one because your support and encouragement can play a big role in getting them the recovery that they may need. Someone with depression can feel all alone, but with your reinforcement, you can aid in their recovery.

Educate yourself

With anything, the more you know the better your chances are of being able to help someone in need. Get on a few depression websites that so you can familiarize yourself with the disorder to be able to relate to your loved one from a informed angle.

Recognize the symptoms of depression

If you can observe the symptoms of depression in your loved one, you can offer the support and solution they need in a timely manner. A person who is depressed may act out in anger, but try not to take it personally because it is mostly likely just the depression acting out.

Facilitate a treatment program

You may not be able to convince someone to go to treatment, but at least you can plant the seed and have all the information readily available if they do become willing. Feel free to contact the staff at the treatment program to ask any questions you may have.

Support them

You alone cannot change the status of their depression, so just being there for them during a painful and possibly debilitating time is the best thing you can do for them. Instead of trying to change them, you can be remembered as a soft place to fall.

Be compassionate

Rendering advice or minimizing their disorder are things that will just push them away from you. Judging or criticize them will also ostracize you from being helpful in their recovery. Being understanding and patient during their time of need can be a more useful way to get them to open up to you.

Take suicide threats seriously

Someone with depression has an increased risk of suicide. Once your loved one feels severely depressed, you should be prepared that suicidal thoughts or behavior can arise. Take them seriously and act immediately. It is not worth the chance of losing someone you love because you may think they are being overly dramatic.

If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention hotline at: 1-800-273-8255

National Suicide Prevention Hotline (24 hour a day)

1-800-273-TALK (8255)

Chat online

Crisis Text Line (24 hours a day)

Text 741-741 from anywhere in the USA, anytime, about any type of crisis

Drug Slang: How to Know if Your Teenager is Using

Drug Slang: How to Know if Your Teenager is Using

Teenagers are synonymous for trying to pull the wool over their parent’s eyes to get away with something. In this day and age of technology, teenagers have come up with their own language to be able to text and email their friends to communicate drug slang without their parents knowing any difference. Even with parental supervision to where parents can read their text messages and emails, parents can be clueless to the ever-changing secret jargon that teens use to disguise what is really going on.

Looking at teen’s messages to see any discrepancies in the text, can be an indication that the teen is up to something. Most of the language they use looks harmless, but look for weird phrasing in sentences, repetition of certain words, or anything that just looks unusual. Seeing phrases that do not make any sense does not necessarily mean that the teen is on drugs, but exploring more into the situation to be certain is the best bet.

Parents should educate themselves on whatever terminology is being used today, although it can be hard to keep up. Using online slang decoders and logging into urbandictionary.com, can help parents keep up with the latest drug slang and trends. Aside from learning the vocabulary that teens use for drugs, parents would be more successful at interpreting what their teens are talking by enlightening themselves on the different drugs that are out there today.

Drug Slang Basics

 

Cocaine

 

Charlie coke, nose candy, powder, toot, snow, white

 

Marijuana

 

420, blunt, chronic, grass, green, Mary Jane, pot, tea, trees, weed

 

Cough Medicine

 

candy, dex, robo, skittles, tussin, vitamin D

 

Ketamine

 

breakfast cereal, horse tranquilizer k, ket, special K, vitamin K

 

MDMA

 

Adam, clarity, ecstasy, e, essence, lover’s speed, Stacy, x, xtc

 

Heroin

 

anti-freeze, brown sugar, H, horse, junk, poison, smack

 

Methamphetamine

 

crank, chalk, fire, glass, ice, speed

Since teen slang evolves into different slang all the time, it is important to stay up to date with the latest craze. By noticing red flags in teen’s behaviors and communication, protecting innocent teenagers from making a big mistake can be the thing that saves them.

If you have a teenager that needs help with drugs and alcohol, Serenity Oaks Wellness Center can be a place to get them into recovery. We use 12-Step aspects and holistic therapy to help maintain sobriety. Give one of our staff members a call today: 855-652-2683

Should You Be in a Relationship in Early Sobriety?

Should You Be in a Relationship in Early Sobriety?

Getting into a relationship in the first year of recovery is typically frowned upon. There are so many changes going on in your life that a relationship can distract you from recovery. Addiction usually stunts a person emotionally causing their maturity level to possibly be the same age as when they started drinking and using, which can create unnecessary emotional turmoil.

Being in a relationship is a big decision to make in early sobriety especially since the success rate is very low. Trying to figure out if they are “the one” should be carefully considered to prevent triggers that could lead to a relapse.

Have you run the idea through your sponsor, therapist or mentor?

You may feel better because you are sober, but that does not mean that you are emotionally, physically, or spiritually ready to take on everything that encompasses a relationship. Trusting somebody else’s instincts in early sobriety is a good idea especially if they have the best intentions for your recovery.

Have you done the Steps or therapy work?

If you just got sober and have not done any recovery work yet, you will be the same person in a relationship as when you were abusing substances. Trust the process that recovery has to offer in personal growth so that you can break the cycle of your past mistakes in relationships. The steps and therapy work will you give an opportunity to look at the patterns that were keeping you from having successful relationships in the first place.

How well do you know the other person?

Getting to know somebody before you jump into a relationship is important and may be something that you did not wait for in the past. Learning about their morals and the things that they believe in can help you decide to whether this person is somebody that is worth taking the risks of having a relationship in early sobriety with. You should inquire if they have a sponsor and if they have started step work if they are in recovery. If they are a “normie”, then making sure they are supportive of your recovery journey is crucial.

What is the rush?

Addicts are known to push instant gratification to the limit. Trying to take things slowly can give the relationship more time to cultivate in getting to know one another and becoming friends first. If anybody is trying to rush you into something that you are not ready for, it is okay to set a boundary that is going to be best for your recovery.

There is somebody out there for everybody, but doing in the timeframe that is good for your recovery is the most important aspect. You were not meant to be alone, but you should be with somebody that will grow with you and support your ongoing in your recovery.

You deserve to be ADORNED in your recovery. Life skills, coping tools, education, holistic healing, and a sober support system will help you gain long term sobriety. Serenity Oaks Wellness Center offers a comprehensive treatment program for recovering from drug and alcohol addiction. Call us today for information: 855.652.2683